LOCAL NEWSPAPER WORKERS SUPRISED THAT THEY HAVE NOT BEEN REPLACED AND STILL HAVE
JOBS AFTER LEAVING FIVE MONTHS AGO. MAYOR SEEKS PROBE.
A wage dispute that has lasted 27 years erupted into a walk out in late April.
All four employees of the Nastacootchie County Town Cheesmo decided they had finally had enough,
and, citing lack of porn as the primary reason, staged a strike on April 20th, 2005.
It seems it took several weeks before anyone noticed.
The only self-proclaimed "crazy man 'bout town," Karl Rhimjaab, knew something was awry after missing Tuesday Night Bowling three weeks in a row. "I don't even know what do without my Town Cheesmo. Everyday I get up, eat nine pieces of bacon, drink coffee, make love to my hand, and check to see what day it is by reading your newspaper." After nearly four months without getting the paper, Mayor R. A. Puddhelmet called a town meeting to demand an explanation. Unfortunately, all town meeting notices are posted in the Town Cheesmo, so none of the residents of Nastacootchie County were ever informed of the meeting. It took two more weeks before anyone thought to simply stop by the newspaper's offices. There they found a note, "Took vacation, be back in 5." Luckily, budget surpluses have allowed the county to subsidize the staff's demands. So with smut in hand, the Town Cheesmo staff is back and happier than ever. |
|
You read that right. If not, read it again. Ok, one more time. Yes, the Nastacootchie County Town
Cheesmo will soon include an official "Dick Butt Kiss and the Tightends Classifieds" section. We
know the idea's been tossed around before, but a source close to the editor has told us that it
has been approved by the "Powers that Be."
The service will be FREE to all fan club members.
All submissions can be sent via email.
Due to limited space, no submission is guaranteed to be printed. Please include shoe size with all submissions.
Please check our website for new information on the whereabouts of PBR. If you have any sightings to report, please contact the PBR Search Foundation. |