NASTACOOTCHIE COUNTY: INFORMATION TECHNOLOGY PILLAR OR BLACK HOLE?
LOCAL PHONE OPERATORS WORK OVERTIME TO FIELD FIVE NEW CALLS A WEEK
 All three of the full-time operators at the Nastacootchie
County Public and Private Works Co. have been working double and triple shifts
for nearly a week. On Tuesday, volunteer analysts were able to craft a
semi-reasonable explanation for the sudden influx in phone calls.
According to the volunteers, the Nastacootchie County Town Cheesmo, Online
Edition, has now been in circulation for over one year. In that span
of time, national awareness of Nastacootchie County has risen by what locals
are affectionately calling "a butt load and a half." The volunteers were quick
to point out, however, that any official ratings would have to be verified by
Nastacootchie County's official fact checker. At press time, fact checker and
town historian, Jack Milford, was unreachable by phone due to unexpected local
telephone activity.
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WANNA DO YOUR NASTACOOTCHIE COUNTY CIVIC DUTY?
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It's only right that we take every effort to spread the gospel of Dick Butt
Kiss. So it's only right that we call on you, our loyal fans, to help us in
those efforts. How can you help? You can start by changing your underwear. Once
that's done, you can tell us about your local watering holes, because Dick Butt
Kiss and the Tightends wants to put on a show in every corner of the world! So
if you have a favorite spot, or you know a guy who knows a guy who knows about
a girl who heard we were cool, then shoot us an
email. We'll make every effort to meet that girl, and maybe, if the
mood is right, we'll put on a show. For information about our current schedule,
please visit our events
page.
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